When you love someone, you love him the way he is
My man and I have been together almost two years. We went out for beers two or three times when he said he loved me, but this was only a few days apart not a few months. I was alarmed by the rush, but we went back to his place and became physical. He said we should get married, and I was high off finally finding a man to marry me and agreed. We filed for a certificate downtown and were going to do it Quaker style. I freaked out at the speed of everything and stopped the marriage.
He doesn’t like my hair and wants me to dye it black. He said I’m fat, which I would love to lose weight but stressing over it isn’t going to help me. His best friend is a woman, which I respect but I don’t think he handles the dynamic very well. I’ve felt disrespected over her three times. I don’t know if they are honest mistakes or red flags that he doesn’t care how I feel. He is also a hypocrite and says I don’t need guy friends besides my pastor.
I’m not sure if this is related to the topic of men falling out of love, but you seem to give good advice
I’m sorry I had to cut your story short. I actually cut it exactly where I see the problem. This guy doesn’t accept you. He wants to change you. Wanting to change someone is not love. I don’t know why your self esteem is so low (the first hint was saying “I finally found someone wanting to marry me”), but it affects your choices in life. You don’t have to find someone to be willing to marry you. You are perfect just the way you are, and the right guy will see it and be excited to marry you. He won’t try to change you (not before a few years of marriage go by…). The problem is not with him, it’s with your thoughts about yourself. We attract the person that reflects what we think about our self. I hope you understand what I’m saying. I would pull away and rebuild my self worth and self esteem before I date anyone else. Anything else is a waste of time. sonraki Sayfa Good luck!
Lisa I appreciate that you have this blog for many people like my self who would like to hear someone’s opinion.
I only see the signs , plus he tells me he doesn’t care for me or what I think but why am I still here why can’t I just leave and not feel anything. He gets upset when I say something about him hanging to much with his kids and does everything for them I mean they have jobs there in there twentys am I wrong for feeling like this ? But I made mistakes before but that’s the past I font do what I did a long time ago he is constantly with his kids and I mean I’m home and I can’t say anything because of I do all hell breaks loose ! What should I do and when I want to leave him he tells me he loves me and there I go he is 43 and I am 29 there’s a difference and I try to help him because he has type 1 diabetes he said that I don’t Care but I’m the one constantly crying trying to tell him how I feel and he just doesn’t give a damn till I’m laying down he will finally come and hug me then I give in again what does everyone think I should do .